Fictional speakers / Factual speakers who are you listening to?

In life you will encounter two types of people that you will engage in conversation with. Some will speak factual and some will speak fictional. Fictional speakers often can be classified as delusional.They speak the way they desire their life to be the problem is it hasn't come to fruition yet which means its not true which in turn makes it fictional. Once you realize this character trait in a person it would be to your advantage to not entertain them. Continuing to entertain a fictional speaker will pull you into their delusion of life and in  time you will find yourself behaving in the same manner.
Factual speakers speak only on the facts anything that they say they have proof to back it up. They mainly speak on things that they have gone through in their life or things that others have gone through which means they have knowledge of what they're talking about .They don't make things up they speak only from what they see and how they perceive it.
Fictional speakers will often times create a atmosphere that can only be seen by them it's not real it's a delusion or an illusion of a portrait they have painted about their lives. How do you determine whether not a person speaks fictional or factual?
As you pay attention to their actions and you watch how they live this will show you if what they're saying is true or false once you realized a person is a fictional speaker you no longer take to heart anything that they say because chances are its not true these are the people you should detach yourself from, It's not that you think you're better than them it's just that they're thinking pattern is dysfunctional and if you continue to entertain them it could cause you a great deal of frustration.
The safest person to attach yourself to is the factual speaker someone that speaks the truth and only speaks on facts this person will be honest with you they will be truthful with you and although you may not like it at times it's usually something that you need to hear that will aid in your growth and maturity. This is the type of relationship that you take with you to the next level this is the person that will not sugarcoat anything. They will tell you exactly what you need to hear. Is this person perfect? absolutely not they make mistakes and have made mistakes but chose to learn from them. The wisdom that they are bestowing upon you is something good and will bring forth good fruits to your life this is the person you want to keep around. Lose fictional and gain factual.

50 shades of crazy

There is a large quantity of people walking around with different levels of mental and personality disorders. When gone undiagnosed these people enter into relationships with normal people with normal minds and those bonds create toxic situations. Once the normal person gets sucked in the representative disappears and the disordered mate begins to show signs that they are 50 shades of crazy. The red flags begin to wave to you but at this point your so blinded by the lust that you can't see the flags so you sit in it. Day by day the crazy gets more intense the lies come more frequently. You know their untrust worthy yet you continue to pour more of your attention into them. You will normally find yourself in this place if you have sex with them sooner than that you should. Sex especially if it’s good will further blind you. The crazy person is well aware of this and that’s why they move so quickly in the romance department. they have now manipulated your mind and your body. You know there’s something wrong but they convince you that its right. You begin second guessing things you would have never second guessed before. The crazy intensifies and is now coming by way of selfish acts, frequent mood changes, isolation of themselves from you, and bouts of silence. When you try to find out what’s wrong with them they will find a way to blame you or somebody else for their actions. Crazy does not improve so once you figure out a person is crazy you must not try to fix them or be extra nice thinking they will return the favor because this is not going to happen. Your best bet is to research their behavior and most likely you will find through research that they indeed have either a personality disorder, a mental disorder or both. When people display acts of crazy don’t waste your time trying to deal with it. Many people especially married people will stick with the crazy person because they took a vow and they want to abide by it which will only work if you’re ok with being miserable and married. The definition of crazy reads “mentally deranged especially as manifested in a wild or aggressive way.” Once someone displays these traits don’t stick around for it to get worst get out and stay out.  The best life for a sane person is to attach themselves to like minded people. Leave the crazies to their craziness and enjoy your life.

Do they know you have a relationship with God?

 When you mention God the devil will flee. Always let people know about your relationship with God. If it's an intimate relationship that means God is guiding you and showing you what you need to see about people so let them know that he is present in your life and you do indeed hear the
"little voice". This piece of information will alter the way they INTENDED to handle you. If they had a toxic agenda, they will flee why? Because when they know God has your ear they won't get too far with a toxic agenda. This behavior will allow you to welcome the right relationships into your space. If you’re not at this place yet on your journey, I encourage you to seek this relationship with God before you seek one with another human being. It's important that you strive for an intimate relationship with God because this is when you can hear him speak into your spirit very clearly and it's no doubt that God is guiding you. You can count on him to guide you in the right direction and if you are reading his word enough and praying enough this allows him to trust you and know that you will be obedient to what he tells you to do. This relationship is not conquered overnight. Everyone is different so you will reach it at the level your supposed to. As long as you’re seeking it you will eventually obtain it. God will hear your prayers and the relationship will begin to form. Once its formed the way you view life will change. You will handle your relationships differently because God will be guiding you instead of you guiding you. when we do things our way many times it doesn't work out your relationship with God will show you everything that you need to know because you are connected with him he will live through you which will enable you to discern healthy relationships vs unhealthy toxic relationships. If you are single and wanting to make some changes and do things differently because doing it your way is not working right now is a good time for you to work on your relationship with God and watch and see how your earthly  relationships begin to change. If your currently in a relationship and you haven’t developed this relationship with God you can still do so by dedicating some time to prayer and talking to God this too will improve your current relationships. We are so busy trying to put together fleshly relationships and becoming frustrated when they don’t work out when what we should be busy doing is developing an intimate relationship with God and allowing him to guide us so that we can enter into good relationships with people that have our best interest at heart. Try it I promise you won’t be disappointed.

What is the condition of their heart?

Psalms 51:10 - Create in me a clean heart, O God; and renew a right spirit within me.

The condition of your heart will determine how your life turns out. Without your heart your body could not survive life.Oftentimes we just look at the heart as a organ inside of our body that pumps out blood. What we fail to do is to study the conditions of our hearts as well as the hearts of others. A careful look at the condition of a persons heart can save you a lot of time because if their heart condition is bad the way they treat you will be bad. Below are my picks of different heart conditions. If you see yourself in any of these or if you see people you have a  close connection within these descriptions take time to own the information and do what's needed to continue being big hearted or make some changes and get rid of your bad heart doing this will change the quality of your relationships.

BIG HEART- Big hearted people are generous ,selfless and kind they love to help others and they love to make people feel good they will give their last to anyone in need. It is proven that  having a big heart is a good way to be especially because its the way God designed us all to be.While being a good trait having a big heart can  sometimes bring on big pain.When your heart is open and big it's susceptible to pain. When someone doesn't appreciate your heart or is incapable of being a good person themselves, they will oftentimes take advantage of the big hearted person leaving them with a void. To possess a big heart is to possess a caring heart when you genuinely care about other people and their feelings you rarely do anything that would be hurtful to them this is a huge attribute for the big hearted person, Having a big heart is a wonderful place to be on your journey it's also a difficult place to be especially if you haven't properly studied the conditions of peoples hearts. Big hearted people oftentimes connect themselves to selfish hearted people and the connection never prove fruitful to the big hearted individual this is why having discernment is essential to aid in weeding out the cold, selfish, broken hearted people. Once  this concept is learned  the big hearted person will begin to surround themselves with people that will appreciate their heart and not take advantage of it. Big hearted people are rare in the world today so if you run across one don't take advantage of them be appreciative of them in your life and treat them just as good as they treat you.

HARD HEART- The hard hearted person is the one that's been hurt one too many times be it  at the hands of a parent a family member or friend somebody hurt them and  whenever they tried to have an open heart somebody broke it. Having your heart hurt multiple times can eventually turn it hard. This is a time when you must also pray for discernment and learn who exactly you can give your heart to. hard hearted people normally hurt other people because they don't have any feelings they shut their heart down build a wall around it and no feelings come in or go out if you find yourself in some way connected to a hard hearted person you will never get the respect or the attention that you deserve  because a hard heart doesn't feel. If you find yourself or notice other people behaving in a manner that is nonchalant and non caring it may be because their heart or your heart is hard once you develop a hard heart first recognize it as being a flaw and then you must work on it daily to soften. A hard heart can be  softened with the right prayer and diligent work to be a better person if you find that a person that you're dealing with has a hard heart and they're perfectly okay with it do yourself a favor and disconnect from that person you'll never get what you need from them. Some signs of a hard heart is
1. Non communicative
2.No compassion
3. Shows minimal affection
4.non caring of others feelings

COLD HEART- The cold hearted person can be similar to the hard hearted person the only difference is when a person's heart turns cold it becomes numb. Cold hearted people lack genuine affection . They may show affection towards you sometimes but its only when there's a need. When they want something from you they fake acts of affection to get what they want. This behavior is almost always  temporary. After the need is met they go back to non feeling and when people have  no feelings they are  unsympathetic unfriendly, insensitive and unloving. The cold hearted person has also been damaged  and their past hurts or current hurts has caused their heart to turn cold. The danger of dealing with a cold hearted person is you will hardly never get anything positive from them. Cold hearted people lack joy in their heart because their heart is cold. Oftentimes people's hearts with turn cold when they go through a traumatic life situation or some type of tragedy that causes them to not want to feel anymore they feel like if they don't feel anything then nothing  bad can come upon them. What they  fail to to realize in that statement nothing bad will come upon them but nothing good will come upon them either. A cold heart breeds negativity and in order to maintain a healthy relationship with another human being you have to be able to have compassion and  feelings of love for them and cold hearted people don't have feelings. It's not typical for a cold hearted person to admit that their heart is cold their behavior usually shows the coldness in their heart however if you yourself feel that your heart is cold then you should do a self reflection to find out what caused your heart to turn cold and once you realize what made you that way you can work towards releasing it and  letting  it go. This process of ownership and change will allow your heart to warm back up and your new warm heart will show you that  there are people who's  intentions are not to break your heart or hurt you you just have to surround yourself with the right people. If you are in relationship with a cold hearted person know that you should consider the health of your own heart because if  a warm big  hearted person stays around a cold heated person for an extended amount of time the warm hearted person will most likely pick up bad habits from the cold hearted person. Cold hearted people are the ones we learn to love from a distance and not get too close because cold hearted people give no reciprocity to big hearted people. Here are some signs of a cold hearted person
1. No compassion
2. Non empathetic
3.unemotional
4.moody
5.hard to love
6.insensitive
7.detached

BROKEN HEARTED- Broken hearted people become broken hearted because they have become or allowed themselves to become overwhelmed by grief or disappointment. Most often its  a case of someone they loved disappointing  them or letting them down  and their  heart is broken by it. Many times broken hearted people become despondent , mournful, sad and miserable. They carry these traits because they won't allow the broken pieces of their heart two mend back together most broken hearted people have been affected by another broken hearted person. If not dealt with its a vicious cycle of  the saying hurt people hurt people. The cycle carries on with the broken hearted going  around breaking other people's hearts because they have not yet realized that their heart too has been broken and has not been mended back together. you can determine if a  person is broken hearted by the way they speak to and about you. Broken hearted people normally aim to break hearts because they have failed to take the proper time to heal their own heart. You can spot a brokenhearted person because their mood it's often time sad ,despondent and negative. You may find yourself looking at these behaiviors as them just  having a few bad days or going through a hard time but you will soon notice the mood doesn't change. A heart broken person will not get better until they learn how to mend the pieces of their broken heart and the only way to do thisis the first own it as being a issue in your life and next dealing with the source that broke your heart and forgive it and let it go. This does not mean you must confront the person or situation that broke your heart it means you accept it for what it is and move past it don't allow the one that hurt you continue to rent space in your world once you release them  this is the moment when your broken heart will mend back together.

When your heart condition is not in a good state you must shut off the valve and deal with what's going on.
In the physical sense when your heart gets clogged you have a heart attack
In the spiritual sense if your heart is clogged you lack the ability to show behaviors that are required to be a good person. The only way to cure a bad heart condition is to make positive changes and learn to let go of that which caused your heart to go bad. Embrace that truth and your heart condition will improve.

ARE YOU EMASCULATING YOUR MAN?

EMASCULATE :to make (a man) feel less masculine : to deprive (a man) of his male strength, role, etc.
: to make (something) weaker or less effective

Often times depending on their personality type  many women will choose a man that they eventually will end up emasculating. When a woman emasculates a man she strips him of his God appointed manhood. The mans role in the relationship is to lead, protect, and provide for his family and the woman's role is to be his help mate. For many different reason women don't know this or they do know it and they choose to ignore it because they want to do it their way. One reason woman don't follow their correct role in a relationship is lack of knowledge and refusal to be by herself. The woman that can't function without a man will oftentimes settle just to say she has a man.  This mindset will lead to you choosing someone that wasn't on your level from day one. Oftentimes its not taught to us that we should be equally yoked with our mates and then with this lack of knowledge we fail to take the time to study our roles in a relationship and for that we do things backwards and out of order.  This happens because you don't know any better. When a woman is raised to be  independent she is taught to make things happen whether a man does it or not. With this type of upbringing you tend to become self sufficient and aggressive and you adopt the "nurturing" spirit . nurturing women are usually kind hearted and very giving and although these are good character traits to possess you must be careful because this type of behavior attracts needy weak minded, selfish men. This is the man that's grown on his birth certificate but in reality he is a little boy trapped inside a grown mans body. This person is a easy target for emasculation  simply because he has no desire to be responsible he wants to live care free and not have any real grown up responsibly he has no desire to  lead protect or provide all he wants is for someone to take care of him so emasculating him is almost effortless and can sometimes be done without you realizing your doing it. Emasculated men don't have a say. Whoever is doing the most gets the most say in the relationship. A woman that takes on the role of the leader makes the decisions while her man follows. This is cute in the beginning but before its all over it will become a problem. When the woman realizes she's acting outside of her role she grows tired of being in control of things her man should be handling. This is pivotal moment in a women's life when she wakes up one day and realize she's growing and he's not and what's really bad is its all her fault. How? By needing to be in control and  emasculating him years earlier her focus was on being in control and  she never took time to realizes she picked a man that wasn't capable nor did he have a desire to be the leader of the household. In this situation its not likely that he's going change. Once you have emasculated a man for a certain amount of time its almost impossible to reverse the effects. In his mind he's saying  "Why should he start being a man now?" Why should he take responsibility now? Why should he pay for something now?". So now the woman is tired of doing his job and hers and she wants change. I regret to inform you change is not going to happen WHY? because his lack of maturity wont allow it.
First of all you must embrace the fact that a REAL grown man cannot be emasculated why? Because mature minded men already know their role in a relationship so a woman will never have the opportunity  to control him. Grown men take care of their families and have their own voice so understand if your man didn't show these grown man qualities in the beginning he's not going to start in the middle of the relationship .At this stage  one of two things will happen you will either continue to deal with it and be miserable or you will set standards and be strong enough to walk away if he can't comply. And when you walk away know that its NEVER a woman's role to be the head of her household when there's a man there with her. Learn from it and grow from it.
If any of this resembled your situation take a moment to own it and work towards making positive changes. Self reflection is the best reflection.

#1 Fools Chronicles 12 tips on conquering and dealing with foolishness

In life you will encounter people that think they know everything. In their minds everything they do is right and if they happen to do something wrong its never really their fault. These type of people refuse to own their flaws which in turn puts them in the category of being a fool. Why? Because there is no perfect  person walking the face of the earth and to think that you do no wrong is both simple minded and foolish. We all have flaws and we all can stand to be corrected  in some areas of our lives and its foolish to think your beyond correction. Those who claim to be the smartest oftentimes are smart where book knowledge is concerned but most often lack common sense . These are the ones who place themselves on a pedestal that there lack of common sense does not allow them to  firmly stand on. When you place yourself in a pedestal you  must be careful because you put yourself in the position where your unable to accept any type of constructive criticism. This type of behavior will eventually  backfire on you and cause you to  not only look simple but it will also stunt your growth. You can't grow if you think you have no faults. Sometimes God will  place people in your life to give you the constructive criticism  that no one else had the courage to give you and if you waste that opportunity to learn by becoming defensive and offended you will have missed a opportunity to learn something that could potentially help you along on your journey. Don't hate the messenger take that energy to do a self reflection look in the mirror and use what you've learned to move you from foolish to favored.

Emotional rollercoaster of regret(Part 2)

Emotional rollercoaster of regret
roll·er coast·er
Noun
An amusement park attraction that consists of a light railroad track with many tight turns and steep slopes, on which people ride in...
Verb
  Move, change, or occur in the dramatically changeable manner of a roller coaster.

The emotional rollercoaster of regret is a completely different feeling, on this ride  in the beginning when it begins to creep slowly upward the feeling is fear and terror your scared your heart is beating fast and very soon you know you made a big mistake by getting on this ride. What was I thinking about. You know you don't like rollercoasters but  the excitement you saw from everyone else's faces made you think this was the right choice. Maybe it would make you happy and excited. Never once thinking you hate the feeling of your stomach dropping and your heart beating fast with fear. The things that run through your mind is " I have to get off", " why did I do this" .At this point none of that matters because the ride has started and your already approaching the top. As you get to the top you begin to feel ill as if you may lose the chili dog you just finished eating. You are totally disgusted with yourself for even getting on this ride. You had been here before and you didn't like it the last time. You  ask yourself why would I do this to myself again? These are some of the same questions you ask yourself when you enter into a relationship with the wrong person once again.
As you begin struggling to find a answer it happens. The ride drops it takes a plunge downward going 100 miles per hour. You knew it was coming but still wasn't prepared for the feeling it gave you as you felt your stomach drop down to your ankles and pure fear takes over your heart. This is not a good feeling ,you never want to feel like this again. As the ride continues to flip you up and down and all around  for what seems like forever ,your feeling like your heart is going to jump out of your chest.  At this time you begin praying and asking God if he gets you off this ride alive you will never do this again. Your eyes are glued shut and you just want it stop. Suddenly without any notice it stops. As you unbuckle your seat belt you promise yourself your never getting on this rollercoaster again. The fear was so intense and that feeling of being sick to your stomach was too much for you to ever bear again so from that day on you never get back  on that rollercoaster again. This is the rollercoaster that you wouldn't stand in line for any amount of time to get back on in fact you will never even look at it again. This was it  you realize this particular ride did not make you happy in fact it almost scared the death out of you . In a relationship that's not worthy of your time, this type of emotional rollercoaster is never good for you. No matter how many times you go through it the feeling will always be sickening. You will never feel happy once it's over. In fact the feeling is quite the opposite . You feel regret, anxiety, and fear. Your all shook up and your mad at yourself for putting your heart through that turmoil. this was bad choice and you won't make that mistake again.
Life is like a rollercoaster it will start of slow and quickly starts to move at a rapid pace. Sometimes within a split second it will have you upside down. When riding this rollercoaster of life you have to stop and decide who do you love more you or them? If the answer is you ,you simply refuse to accept anymore of the pain. This is when you pick your belongings up and step off this ride and never get back  on again. If you've been on the ride for a long period of time it will take a lot of praying and even more soul searching to realize your worth and to decide that  you deserve better but once the light bulb clicks inside your soul you can exit without every looking back.
It's really just that simple.
Know your worth
Value yourself